I have stared at this blank page at least once a month for the last 6 months telling myself – write something, anything! I’ve even started a few things but then tossed them in the trash can. And I’ve found myself actually starting to dread even coming and trying to write anything because I “won’t be able to anyway.”

So at the risk of copyright infringement, I am forcing myself to make like a shoe and get on with it already.

So what have the last 6 months brought me? Well, much of the same as it has for all of us. More working from home, more not going anywhere, more overall isolation from friends and family. Not really much to say there right?

So anything else? Unfortunately, yes. We found out our 3 year pug had PDE and despite our best hopes, very soon thereafter, ended up having to put him to sleep. On December 23rd. Merry effing Christmas.

And my brother died unexpectedly this summer. He’d battled most of his life with mental health and substances abuse issues and it all finally just got the better of him. He and I weren’t close, but still. He’s my brother and so young, just 30, and it still just seems a bit surreal even all these months later.

And then more recently Dave’s dad passed away. He’d been sick for a while, pancreatic cancer, but things just progressed so fast at the end. Against conventional COVID wisdom we went to see him and the rest of the family at Christmas. Bonkers-insanity in this day and age to have 15 people staying in the same house, but I’m glad we did it (though that is in part easier to say in hindsight since no one got sick.) It was the first time in something like 8+ years that that entire family had been in one place at one time. His dad was so happy to be able to get a family photo with everyone – it was worth it just for that.

So that was Christmas weekend. He was sleeping a lot and easily tired out, but still up and about, eating dinner with everyone, having conversations. Less than two weeks later he was going into home hospice. In just that short two weeks he could no longer get up and about. Everyone rushed back, even from Colorado, to see him again. The boys and Dave’s mom spent the weekend up there chatting with him when they could, and just being near while he slept most of the time. We had to leave on Sunday. We got the call Monday afternoon from his brother that he has passed. It was so quick – it was almost unbelievable.

So yeah, all that’s happened.

Anything good? I mean, it hasn’t all been “family and pets dying” bad, but there also haven’t been any special good things either. Haven’t won any money. Haven’t bought a new car or something. Haven’t reconnected with any long lost friends… just nothing of particular note that isn’t, well, completely shitty.

I had a quiet and nice birthday in September, Dave made me dinner. We still went to the corn maze this fall since it was outdoors, and so we at least got to see a few friends after months and months, albeit from 6+ feet away and with masks. We had a Covid-safe little Halloween party at the neighbor’s in lieu of trick or treating. We had campfires and drinks with our neighbor. We had a quiet but nice Thanksgiving. We had “drive by latkes” in a friends’ driveway. Despite everything going on we managed to have a quiet and okay Christmas. Eli stayed up and watched the ball drop for the first time. I got my first COVID vaccine shot. And that really is about it.

So like I said, not much to say, but there. At least I finally just did it.